Pattinson & Stewart: Is the Romance Real?



With the filming of New Moon under way in Vancouver, the newest batch of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart romance rumors should start rolling out any day now.
Even though the two laugh off the persistent claims of a real-life love affair, that hasn't stopped many from thinking otherwise.
So what's really going on? Their co-stars have some ideas…
Edi Gathegi, who plays Laurent, tells me the cast and crew have pretty much ignored the gossip.
"I can't even think of those two together at all," he told me during his recent stop in Los Angeles for the launch of Catherine Hardwicke's Twilight: Director's Notebook. "Kristen has a boyfriend! It's onscreen and that's it."
Ashley Greene, aka Alice Cullen, says Pattinson and Stewart are, in a way, victims of their own success.
"Their chemistry is fantastic, but no, they are not in a romantic relationship," Greene said at the Twilight at Midnight DVD launch event at Hollywood's Hot Topic store. "They are good actors and it is basically what it comes down to."
She added, "That's kind of the advantage that we had on Twilight. Everyone has such great chemistry. With as big a cast as it was, and as young a cast as it was, we all just got along so fantastically."
And it sounds like all that feel-good camaraderie is already spilling over into New Moon. Greene said the cast is already getting in some bonding time off the clock. Peter Facinelli, who plays vampire patriarch Dr. Carlisle Cullen, recently had everyone over for dinner.
"He cooked pasta for all of us," Greene said. "We all came to his house and ate and drank and talked. It's a bizarre thing, because we kind of all looked at each other and were like, 'Sooo, what's your life been like?' It was fun."

Taken from http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/marc_malkin/b105721_pattinson_stewart_romance_real.html


I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Started emo-ing recently...
and writing emo songs...

heres one example...

Single Tear

Don’t know myself anymore,
Can’t even feel myself,
My heart feels so numb, so dead, I’m trying
So hard to make it alive again, but
Without you, it won’t even come to life.

You were everything to me,
And i knew my heart was weak, and you knew,
So why did you leave me?
The only good reason that I could think of was that you
Wanted us to just be friends, and yet didn’t
Want to hurt me.

But is that really the truth, or am I lying to myself,
Like you did to me in every kiss, every touch?

Told myself that I was so over you,
That it was time to move on,
But I saw you yesterday with your new girl,
You just saw me alone with my friends,
I smiled and waved, said hello, you did the same,

And I hoped that you actually felt my pain,
Or at least felt the same for letting me go,
And as I walked away, I kissed you lightly on your cheek,
Knowing that maybe that would be the last time i would see you
In my life.

I turned away, refusing to let you see the single tear that flowed.
I walked back quickly to my friends, where they started comforting me,
They knew just how I felt, I wiped away that tear, turned around just one
Last time, you turned back too, our eyes met, I shied away, that action
Forcing out endless apologies to you.

Chorus

That single tear that fell, more threatened to come out,
But I held them off, I knew you felt my pain,
I knew you wanted to come running back,
To say that you couldn’t bear to see me in so much pain,
For a risk of losing your other girl and losing me as a friend for life.
Yea that single tear that fell, could have caused us alot

On that very day we broke up, I cried, I screamed for you
Not to leave me, to stay with me, that I would change myself,
Undo everything that I did wrong, but you wouldn’t listen, I wonder now;
Do you regret not staying, seeing all the pain I’m in,
Seeing all the guilt etched on my face?
Cause I see all the pain I caused you, and I wish I had been the girl for you.

So I sing that song, what used to be our song,
To make me forget all the guilt i harbored,
And make me hope that you were also listening and forgetting.

Chorus

So as I lay on the green meadow that was our haven,
I realised how shattered my heart is, and how it’ll probably never heal, Cause deep inside, I still loved you.

I reckon for me, its really nice, cause it fits my current predicament..

Gotta go sleep right now, new post up tomorrow guys, gd nite.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Every 91.3 listener got asked if they wanted to go to Bintan for Hutch's b'dae. Obviously, who wouldnt jump at that chance to go? So I asked my mum if i could go. She said no. So I pondered. If I brought a few of my friends along, wouldn't I actually be able to go? So I asked my mum again. And she said no again. I argued. But I'm already bringing my friends along, I know you'll worry bout me, thats why i'm bringing my friends along, they're matured, we can take care of each other!' And she said 'No' again. She then continued 'Yea what happen if something bad happen to you there? What are you going to do?' I argued 'Thats why i'm bringing my friends along! We can take care of each other!' and she was like 'No you're not going, and thats that.' I got damn pissed. So was Maryam. She said that 'We teenagers were human, we had our own pride, our own rights. We should be the ones deciding where to go.' and i agree. It ain't fair. Almost everyone I know, they get to go out with their friends shopping whenever they want to, while i'm stuck here typing feverishly at some blog, or forum, during the holidays. And I'm only entitled to one shopping trip with my friends every week. And how many days are there in a week? Right. Seven. One day for shopping after school every week. Think bout it. Is that fair? You decide whether my parents are being too fucking strict, or already lenient.

P.S: I get blamed for every wrong thing my sister does, blamed and beaten for every test my sis fails.

Jo~

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




CATHERINE HARDWICKE - HARDWICKE QUIT NEW MOON DURING CAST DINNER

TWILIGHT filmmaker CATHERINE HARDWICKE realised she wasn't the right person to helm the sequel NEW MOON - after discussing the looming start date during dinner with the film's stars ROBERT PATTINSON and KRISTEN STEWART.The moviemaker scored the biggest debut ever for a female director when the bloodsucking love story shot to number one in the U.S. box office chart with takings of $69.6 million (£49 million) in late November (08). She was widely expected to take the helm for the follow-up movie before being replaced by American Pie director Chris Weitz. Hardwicke later admitted she didn't feel the studio's schedule - an early 2010 release - gave her enough time to prepare for the film. Now, the director reveals it was while dining with her cast that she decided she should let someone else have the gig - despite admitting she was offered a huge sum of money. She tells E! Online that she was in Paris with Rob (Pattinson) and Kristen (Stewart) at dinner and talking to them and she was asking if this was really the schedule and would they really be starting ten and half weeks from now and they replied that they would, for various reasons which she respects, but she really thought it would be better for somebody else, who hadn't just been working every day for two years without a day off. Catherine is really sad but she would not want to let those people down… even though was offered a very nice amount of money, plenty more than she and her family has ever seen. Catherine would only want to do it only if she was going to actually make it better than Twilight.

Think ya'll Twilight fans have found out already, but who cares.

Jo~

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Zac Efron? A Bad Boy?


Zac Efron has ditched his squeaky-clean image in a new photo spread. The High School Musical hunk, 21, poses with a naked woman in Interview magazine. He says that it was definitely different from anything he had ever done before. Zac wants to leave his clean-cut Disney persona behind when it comes to new roles. Everything he had done in the past has felt very safe, and it was great for a while,' he says. 'But now he's looking for a place to take chances as he want to play with things. Zac says 'Most of the directors that he wants to work with don't even know who he is though their daughters might.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Gaga could end up in jail?!


Nothing is going to stop the new Princess of Pop, Lady Gaga Not even the police!
The Poker Face singer's often risque outfits have gotten the Lady in a bit of trouble, especially with the police. The popparazzi everywhere keep stopping GaGa for her lack of clothes. She says, "It's not that I don't like pants, I just choose not to wear them some days." Most recently she says an incident took place in Chicago when she headed out in a small pair of hotpants. She admits that they weren't really pants at all, but it was really funny because all people saw was this half-naked girl on the street yelling at some cop 'It's fashion! I'm an artist!' It was fun for Lady GaGa at least. As long as she's not going out topless, they shouldn't be stopping her. As Kanye would say, she's an ARTIST!

Kristen Stewart Won't Be Doing The Cliff Dive In New Moon Movie


Kristen says that she won’t be going through with the stunt of jumping off the cliff. Kristen has to hand off that 'jumping off the cliff' stunt to some computerized Bella.” There will be a CGI Bella taking over the jump. Kristen said that she was doing some work on the computer part of the effect. She went to do a head-scan the other day and it had to be her ‘determined’ look, like she was just about to jump, so she had to pretend like she was about to scream or something. After the scan it was to be transfered over and generated into a computerized Bella, so that that Bella will be jumping over the cliff. She thinks two of the scenes that she is most looking forward to in the New Moon movie is the motorcycle accident Bella gets in and the cliff dive as she can’t even imagine how beautiful it will look too.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Making this random post before i go to bed, heard loads and loads of gossip from the past few days..

KRISTEN STEWART is preparing to play rocker JOAN JETT in a new movie by listening to the icon's music and partying with the star.Twilight actress Stewart has landed the role of Jett in a new biopic about her 1970s band The Runaways. She is due to begin shooting the movie in late 2009/early 2010, in between filming the second and third installments of the vampire franchise. But the 18-year-old insists she is taking the part seriously and has been immersing herself in Jett's life and music. But Stewart admits she's feeling the pressure that comes with playing a real person onscreen.

Celebrity news sources are reporting that 'tween queen Miley Cyrus is pregnant and Nick Jonas (of the Jonas Brothers) is the father. With all the racy, girl-on-girl action photos of the singer that have surfaced lately, we knew that behind the innocent exterior, Cyrus, 15, was a wild child yearning to let loose. Nick Jonas satisfied that need. Yet, now, sources say that Miley is not pregnant. Miley, 14, vehemently denies the claims and has come forward to People to set the record straight on the matter once and for all. "It's 100 percent false. Someone doctored a J-14 article and posted this online. It's ridiculous and completely untrue. Miley is not pregnant. She just wrapped season two of Hannah Montana and will go on tour beginning Oct. 18," her rep told the magazine.

ALSO...

Kristen Stewart, Star Of Goody-Goody Twilight Movie Got Caught Smoking Drugs!

Kristen Stewart, the brooding young starlet currently playing Bella in the chaste, religiousy teen vampire romance Twilight, was photographed brazenly smoking the devil's herb on the front steps of her Los Angeles home earlier this week. In the middle of the day too. Tsk tsk. I guess we now know why she was so out of it on Letterman the other day.

Kay, thats all for now, gotta go sleep. Will be updating tomorrow.

Love Ya'll

Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




I always wonder what have I done to my family to make them hate me. Usually, my family feels so important to me. Now they just feel like nothing to me, like I can just leave them behind and walk off, paving my own path and visions for my future. But I can't, I love them too much, but I feel the atmostphere at home, theres so much tension, anger, pain, hate all directed towards me. Its sickening, its heart-aching. Everyday, I feel the tension, then I get scolded harshly and threatened with beatings and worse of all, being kicked by my dad.

My mum is the worst, she just... said this to me last time. 'Yea, I hate you, alot, you know? You always influence your sister, make her learn to lie, and if she fail her subjects you are gonna bashed up by me after I beat up your sister. Yea, I'm waiting for you to say that you're leaving this house, or I'll leave, you and I cannot get along. Before you run away, you better tell me or else when you run, I'll go to the police and report you as missing then everyone will know your face and you cannot go anywhere without people recognizing you'

How hurtful is that? To know that your parents have changed so much, from the loving parents into a stranger shadowed by dark walls? When I tell them that I want to get so and so mark for this subject, lets say chemistry, she will riducule me, and not encourage. It isnt fair, why do other people have such loving parents, while I'm just stuck here, being ridiculed in front of everybody, being ridiculed about my results at school, being ridiculed even when I decide to improve my school records.

Some of my friends know this: When I was just a happy go lucky 10 year old Primary 4 kid, that was when all the beatings started, and it always got worse each time, the worst was the time where my mum actually managed to get my dad to kick me, and bash me up on the arms. I was screaming, screaming so loudly, screaming for him to stop, but he was just to obsessed. In the end, when he stopped, I ran into my room, closed the door and start crying like crazy. My dad regretted what he did to me, when he saw how much pain i was in when I was lying on my bed, physical and emotional, he knew i was crying of the pain and thinking in my head 'How could my parents, whom I love so much, actually hit me?' He asked me if I was alright, and I wasnt thinking properly amongst all that pain, and I just shouted, choked it out ' I just want to be alone, let me have some time alright!?' He kept silent and walked out, then came back with something, laid it next to me, and left. He forgot to close the door though, so I stood up and walked silently to close it. Then I sat down on my bed, ignoring the physical pain, and took the cream my dad left for me. It was actually for my bruises then extended all over my arms, and for the pain I felt in the kick that was located somewhere below my spine. It was a mercy I didn't break it.

I dont even know who my parents are right now, they dont know the new me they see now, I always wonder wheres my old family, where are my old parents? I really need some help. My parents arent helping me in the things I want to pursue anymore, they are just indirectly deceiving me, lying to me, telling me that requirements are set very high I want to take in TP.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




DAMN this really sucks alot me and Maryam were supposed to go to the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus but no her mum had to frigging interfere, and ground Maryam cause she failed chemistry by just one mark! ONE MARK! JUST ONE FRIGGING MARK! What crap is this! Now we can't go to the concert.. and those tickets have been wasted. This is real crap. And today I had to be frigging scolded by Miss Hana, when i spent so long, all the way from 3 to 1 am to make my research perfect! And now this crap! Today frigging sucks! I am so sick and tired of today! Kay whatever I'm overreacting yea I know, whatever, but almost everyone knows that I havent got a chance in dont know how long to go to a concert. Life is unfair and it sucks.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




YAY! I have managed to actually finish my research! At last!
I hope that Mrs Chong will accept it, I stayed up till like nearly
1 in the morning to finish this. Now, all I have to do is my work plan!
Yay! Then when I'm done, I am going to school to print during recess
or something. I cant be bothered anymore by that dumb ass PMSing freak.

Kay, I think I have infuriated alot of people today. Or people are trying to
infuriate me, I really cant take it anymore. I go to church when I have time
to do so, and thats rare already, cause of all the frigging stress i get in school!
Its not very easy to be a sec 4 girl and still get time to go church!

Bleh, I am really really tired now, and I am going to head off to sleep, in I think
in like about 10 minutes time. See y'all like tomorrow.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




just when I thought I wouldn't go all emo today... My mum had to scold me just cause of a frigging lame arguement with my sister and she forced me to lock myself up in the room and compose more emo songs about my horrible family, and the person i love so much. Darn me being such a weak girl. Well, good news is that the 2.4km run is tomorrow i think, I'll be able to shed off some weight there, and then try to pass it too, then the next day, i'm going off on a two round run around VJC. I really want to be the me that I visualize each night in my head, the slim, tall, long haired girl. Also, to learn to know more about the guy i love, be his friend, everything. Also, dont say his name here, he might be watching. lol yea he knows my blog link. XD

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Darn it, I was frigging made to go to see the vice principal
of our school today with my other best friend, Lisabeth,
Rachel Lee, Jasmine Soo, Azimah, and Siti Aminah.
Apparently, Mrs Ang said we were real slow in our F and N
coursework (No doubt in that) and that she wanted us to go see the VP.

Well, we stood there, in the general office of our school, waiting while
Mrs Ang (actually, yes ACTUALLY) came and complained about us.
I got rather pissed off at that. Okay so Mrs Chong, our VP, came out
and asked us to sit down in a small room that would have been so
comfortable if I wasn't sitting on the arm of one chair. She talked to
us real nicely, said we simply weren't the type that would purposely not
do our coursework and she asked us like a mum would ask her daughter
if we had any problems. Of course we started bursting out with them and
poor o' Mrs Chong had to write up to two pages of huge post its for us. She
said that we should be more careful with our physical health, try to be more
careful while running, where I nearly always trip at, and try not to trip.
Man, I actually gravitate to that point without knowing, like i can trip over
small steps, tree branches, anything. Even drains too. I tripped over one in
mid January, I think. Sophia was worse off than me though, both of her knees
were ripped up and with blood flowing down to her socks. It took everything for me
to not puke on the spot.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Okay, so like you guys know i went
on air yesterday, and it was all fun
and cool and everything else till my
parents spoiled it for me.

Hutch met us at Braddell Mrt station,
we introduced ourselves and left for
SPH. On the way, Saleha was talking
non-stop, so I left them at it. Then Hutch
turned and walked back to me and said '
Why are you so shy?!' and ruffled my hair.
I was like, ' OMG! OMG!' inside my heart.
We went to the studio and we met JJ,
Rod Monterro, Audre Hooden, Clarence,
Sarah Walker and Audrey. ( I noticed them all
right away lol)

We had fun on the radio station, Hutch
called up one of our friends, Anisha,
to tell her that Joe Jonas was coming
down to the studio this weekend and
that she got picked to meet him.

And she was like, I'm in cca now.
Then she walked into the toilet
and talked more. Then when Hutch
said that we were the ones who made
a plan to call her, she was like ' OMG!
JOVIN?! YOU FRIGGING CALL ME IN
THE MIDDLE OF CCA?! AM I ON LIVE
OR SOMETHING NOW?! i was like, yea,
you are actually. and she was like ' OMG
JOVIN I AM GOING TO KILL YOU
TOMORROW, IN SCHOOL! NO NOT
TOMORROW BUT MONDAY!

Then she called me back again and said
' Hey I was really on live? I was like ' Yea
you were on live' And i continued saying
' Anisha don't ' kill' us, come on, we just
wanted you to share the fun with us, aren't
you surprised or anything? And she went,
no I'm not surprised, I'm freaked out! Then Hutch
talked to her using my phone! My PHONE! OMG
haha!

Okay loads of overreacting there, lol.
Well after we finished, Hutch brought us to see
the rest of the deejays. Rod Monterro was not able
to even look Audre Hooden in the eye, because of what
he was doing. Audre was like shouting ' Shut up la!
Shut up la!' lol it was really funny.

Okay then we met Audrey. She was so awesome!
We started clicking like true girls when Audrey
saw Saleha's awesome jacket! We started talking
from jackets, to kc graduation rings, then to skinny
jeans and hoodies. Hutch had to drag us out (not literally lol)
for lunch. He withdrew some money from his account
and bought us a small pizza, a plate of spagetti,
a plate of calamari, and a steak from the all famous
botak jones resturant... (for himself actually)

Well he then walked us back to the bus stop and said he had
to go back to the studio and we hugged each other (sort of)

Well, Hutch if you ever happen to chance upon this, thanks for
everything, for hosting us, for buying lunch for us.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Yay! I got my contacts today. They aren't of any colour; the optician said it would be best that I wore normal ones first before wearing coloured ones. He wanted me to learn how to wear them contacts since I was new to it. I took like an hour to learn how to take it out, it was fustrating, but worth my time. haha. I am really excited for i may be wearing them tomorrow, that is if Hutch calls me today to tell me the details. I can't wait! I am like full of feelings right now, nervousness scared, happiness, independent, may get me to become very VERY Random. lol.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




GAH! Is Miss Hana PMSing or what?! What is her damn problem?!
People just cannot finish her work finish must also shout.. How lame
can she get! My god, I would drop F and N if it wasn't for my poor
results lor! Argh~ *Cools down* Anyway, before I managed to get
real angry again, I am finally going live on the 91.3fm radio station!
I plan on looking for someone new to follow me, I think Vanessa Chan
from 4/2 isn't interested in coming anymore. Bleh. I only can bring
one person. And I reckon, someone from my class. It makes it easy for us
cause we can have enough time to eat lunch and change. Maybe you,
Michelle, if you read this, or maybe Lisabeth. Argh, i don't know, just tell me
who wants to go alrite! The first person who tells will get to go with me!
Hutch, the DJ hosting us, has goodie bags prepared for us and they include
many music cds, and t shirts from 91.3fm too!

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




YES! I can finally let go of the person
that I used to crush on, you guys know.
I really think he's absurd, irritating and
I'll never know what came over me to
make me like him first. Well, someone else
currently holds my heart right now :D
Some of you know who are they, and some
don't. XD Well, today I skipped choir again with
Abigail, Lisabeth, and Rachel Vu (PEENUT!) XD

This is my first time meeting Abigail, and I have
learn lots from Lis bout her. XD. I think Abigail is
really funny, and she suspects something bout Lis and
I cant tell anyone. haha. Well, Lis went on a frigging
huge shopping trip with us for the coming Valentine's day.
She wanted to get like presents for Eugene and only had
ten dollars, so we had to help her pay up for everything.
Haha, but I don't really mind, just as long her boyfriend
accepts her presents. I'll say this, if he doesnt accept it, and
let the rose I bought for Lisabeth to give to him to die from
lack of water, I'll take my money and find him and slap him
on the face with it. XD I dunno, it sounds absurd, maybe I
won't do it, but it'll make me laugh to no end.

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Man, I just remembered (very lately XD)
that we have coursework to do and we are
not allowed to cook till we finish it and our
practical exam. secondary 4 is getting
so difficult and stressful, but I must keep trying
though, if I want to go to Temasek Polytechnic.
My mum will kill me if I went to ANY ITE.
Stupidiot, irrnnoying her. If I can't cope with poly,
obvously I'll be going there. These words may
sound weird but we learned them from Mrs Lim and
Sarah Anne Barnett. XD can't believe right? haha
I learned hokkien, malay and cantonese words today.
And during a english lesson too. XD Mrs Lim is awesomely
funny when it comes to english. haha. School is getting real
boring in every class except Mrs Lim's class. Mrs Lim class,
when it comes to oral communication with Mrs Wee, or Oei,
whatever, is the only class that can make me fall asleep.
And she doesn't even care when my head starts nodding off.
She just continues teaching. What type of teacher is that? >_>
Bleh this year is SYF for all performing arts and this year is also
our crucial exam year... But I am still going to have to go for choir
when the cca stepdown comes.. But if my friends don't go on
participating in their ccas during the cca stepdown, I'll stepdown too.
I'm not going to eat alone every Wednesday and Thursday during lunch.
I am that type of person who always like to be surrounded by people.
Guess I like being with friends, haha. Kayy, thats all for now. Gotta go do
something important with my blog.

XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Oh great the holidays have started...
And my blog is dying, sadly :( I have nothing
to write about during the holidays, seeing how
i cant hang out with my friends and how i am
being pressured by my parents to finish all my
holiday assignments even though the holidays
started like only weeks ago.. O_0

My parents are becoming more irritating day by day
and its knd of killing my enthusiasm for the holidays
I really want a break from all that school work but
my parents dont want to let that happen.. everyday
they ask me whether i have done my homework yet
and when i tell them no and that i still have a long
way to the start of school next year, they refuse to
listen and say its better to finish first.. and rest later
its kind of nerve wracking my head.. gives me major
headaches whenever my parents talk about homework

Im just doing the homwork bit by bit and since they asked
for me to do my homework, i fastened my pace of the doing
of homework and my parents, apparently are still not sastified!
Gosh, what can i do to make them sastified?! Do all my homework
and get As for all my subjects, just like a little, sucking up to parents
kid? Well, no im not gonna do that! Thye just have to realise they were
the ones who caused me to be a kid with poor results and that the way
they are using is not working out!
XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




lolz today we had like so much fun haha
We had F and N today and only four people
turned up for it: Me, Rachel Lee, Syakillah
and Annisa. And Miss Hurna took a long
time to arrive so Annisa and Syakillah decided
to go over to the bubble tea shop to buy food
and drinks while Rachel Lee went off to meet
Lisabeth and eat breakfast. When Rachel Lee
came back, Miss Hurna approached us and asked
where was the whole class. We told her that only
four people had came and that it included Annisa and
Syakillah. So Miss Hurna decided to treat us for lunch
at KFC and she ordered the Family Fest for us at the
KFC at Parkway Parade. It was so fun there, having
lunch instead of going thru those major boring lessons
for a change

XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Lolz we had soo much fun yesterday lol
it was so freaking damn boring in maths
so Charlene and the rest of us
created a few names for ourselves
lol it was all about Wonderpants stuff!!!

Wondernabei: Charlene
Wonderfucker: Geralda
Wonderchibye: Michelle
Wonderslut: Lisabeth
Wonderkanina: Rachel Lee
Wonderbutch: Jacinth
Wonderselamat: lalala Its Me!!

Hahahahahaha... but the day got worst
that day was my mum's b'day see, and i
wanted to bring my mum to the night
safari for her b'day but the queue was like
so damn long so we couldnt go.. My dad
brough us to a seafood restaurant in IMM
and when we ate they were talking damn
loudly to the manager there, not to mention
trying to overtake a group of drunk men shouting
in therestaurant.. It was like so damn embarrassing
cuz everyone was looking at us and it made me
take out my Twilight book to hide my face...

Speaking of Twilight, i just finished reading it this
morning it was so awesome Edward, by the description
of him in the book is soo major awesome.. Golden eyes..
Muscled figure... eyes that change colour ahhh hes a person
to die for!!!! And Bella i envy and hate the person acting as her
Kristen Stewart, who is acting as Bella, has a man voice!
ewwwwww omg she is soo horrible sounding eurgh i could puke
when i hear her voice... Bleh

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Today, we had our cake-making workshop. It was like so fun lolz. We made the cheesecake first, and we had to add in loads of stuff and that part was way boring so we took pics of one another. I wish i could place them here but sadly i cant due to my half-dead computer. (Damn It LOL) Then we made Blackforest cakes, which for me, was a horrible experience cause my cake when all out of shape and the cream was like all over the place and you do not want to see that XD. Well, making the cheesecake was fun but when I brought it back home, eating the base of the cheesecake was like eating stones. XD

XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel






I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Went to see Miss Goh with my mum today,
didnt go that well, i was crying so badly..
Everytime Miss Goh talked to me, i started
to breakdown and cry. Its like still really
painful the part i cried at the most was
when she asked me ' Why do you want to
advance to secondary 4?' I told her ' I dont
want to suffer again'Then my dear conkhead
of a mum had to butt in and say ' I told her
yesterday, its better for you to stay in Secondary
3 again, feel the pinch of feeling embarrassed,
feel what its like to be a loner, a freak'

I have felt like that before, you know me
teachers scold me, make me look foolish
i have always felt it and i always feel that
no many people can help me feel loved again
I dont even feel the love my mum gives me
anymore its getting lesser and lesser everyday

When i was young, i could feel her love for me
whenever she said 'happy b'day' to me,
but now whenever she sayz 'happy b'day' to me,
i cant feel it anymore its not there at all

When i was young i used to say ' Mum, i wanna be
a vet? Does it pay well, Mum? And she would beam
at me with bright happiness, ruffle my hair and say
' Yes, Jovin, being a vet will pay well, and i sincerely
hope you will become one.' And now, when i tell her
that i wanna slim down, wanna be a singer, she would go
' like as if you can slim down, look at how fat you are
and singing? you arent even nice-looking, so why bother?
Plus you dont even have a good education to begin with'

Its not really nice to have someone you love say ' I hate you'
straight to your face and certainly not very nice to have
someone break your heart by bashing you half to death

XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Got my results today.... found out i had to
retain in Sec 3NA... guess thats what i
deserve... for doing all the things i should
never have done... But what about my mum?
She never encouraged me in my work, always
said she hated me, and would even get my dad
to punch me up till i was bruised and hurt
everywhere; especially in the heart.

When i said i hated her, i got the scoldings.. when
she said she hated me, it was i, i who took the blame
of causing disharmony between the family. They did
not even care that i had stood up for my sister and got
myself into trouble for her.. I got myself punched and
kicked by my dad when i protected her from what i got
from my dad.. I feel sucidal... Been happy only because
i knew i had friends that i could trust, but unhappy
because i knew my family had forsaken me to the dark side of life
XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




My mum is soo obviously a major
weirdo she asked me to clean up the
mess when there was like nothing at
all in the toilet then she went all
' NO YOU DIDNT CLEAN PROPERLY,
OK?! CLEAN IT UP AGAIN OR ELSE
I'LL MAKE YOU USE YOUR TONGUE
TO CLEAN IT UP!'

O_0 seriously the whole parenting world
must have gone mad jeeze She made me
scream myself hoarse about how much i
hated her and she was like ' I hated you
like since you got into secondary school
thats when you started telling lies to me!
I bought two notebooks for you so you
could write your songs inside and this
is what you give me? Well youre welcome to
get out of this house anytime you like. Just tell
me, cause i might get ' worried ' if you didnt
come back!'

I slammed my studyroom door on her and stayed
cooped inside for ages cant remember how long i
was reading a novel and i was breaking down
into tears for some characters that died in the book.
Then my heart was really aching for some reason..
guess i was heartbroken.. I decided to write out some
songs so i took out those two notebooks my mum gave me
and started writing but i never did manage to write one
word when i saw what my mum wrote on the book cover.

It read ' Dearest Jovin, Happy B'day make full use of these
two notebooks in your songwriting' It was really upsetting
cuz i thot they hated me and had no love for me and my heart
broke and i cried when i read it i was like ' Why didnt they tell
me earlier? Why? I wouldnt have done what i just did to them
if i had known that they had loved me enough to do that for me

XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




today we had our ITE trip,
other than havin ITE students whisperin down my ear
' YOUR FUTURE IS HERE' i was like soo shocked i
went ' umm whatever' and walked off towards where
Michelle was waitin for Wesley.

I mean i cant believe that like i have a future and it is
with the art of designing hair or with my music talent
of singing or deejaying! I mean i really really like this ITE but my
mum would so totally make me quit school if i went to ITE!
I cant let that happen to me, I really like the Simei ITE, its facilities
and teachers are really awesome but as seen from above my mum
would do that to me if i went there
XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Yesterday is like my birthday,
and i get freakin shit for it.
First, some of my accounts got
suspended for saying that some
of my teachers were gay. well,
at least im getting it back in a
few hours time so i'll have to
wait.

My birthday presents were the
latest subscription of the Teen
magazine, Demi Lovato's CD,
two majorly boring notebooks,
a packet of seaweed and two
packets of preserved chestnuts
Jeeeze i wish i had gotten more presents

Like as if I deserve what I got. Those presents
costed even less then $35 dollars. Man, a pair of
skinny jeans or some long sleeved shirts would have
been real nice.
XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel




Oh my paramore im soo tired... have black
eye rings at the bottom of my eyes...
stupid stress and exams im so scared about
whether i can go to Secondary Four
Need to prevent getting sick too, been getting
headaches recently. The biggest headache i got
was today. And tomorrow's my b'day! can you
believe my bad luck? And if i get sick i wont be
able to use my voice!
XOXO
Jo

I trusted you in every way; but not enough to make you stay; Rescue Me; Tokio Hotel